I remember coming out of COVID and thinking we were now going to get back to what we used to know and love. While everything was a little fuzzy at first, it soon became clear that the world had changed, and so had I.
This new world seemed to feel harder to be in, harder to love, harder to be inspired by. And being an extroverted introvert (feels oxymoronic, and true :-) ), I had come to appreciate the safety and calm of the small world I/we had created to survive a global pandemic. Re-joining the world didn't seem that appealing.
I find February kinda, sorta similar. It is a season where we are busy surviving, sheltering and protecting ourselves from wind, snow, rain … where it feels quieter and slower and I feel this fuzziness again … is it still winter and I can cocoon, reflect and plan or is spring around the corner and asking me to come out and play, come out and be, come out and do … and I wonder if I really have to come out of the quiet and safety of my semi-hibernation … for what?!
While I am writing somewhat metaphorically, as I found January crazy busy and moving fast, I still feel as though January afforded me the luxury of introspection, downtime and just being. Which is SO good and necessary. In the short-term.
And as it gave me the opportunity to get quieter, I also noticed this could easily become a little isolating. A little purposeless. A little removed from people, removed from the cares and troubles of the world.
I noticed I could tell myself this small quiet lie that staying small, staying protected, being alone is a good thing. That I don’t really need connection. I don’t need to participate in or contribute to the messiness of the world. No one will miss me. No one will notice. I have nothing to give. Someone else will do it. Someone else will fix it. Blah, blah, blah ...
Although it has taken me a lifetime to learn this, we are fortunately (and unfortunately), the world. If the world is full of hardships and hard realities, I have somehow contributed to this reality (as have we all). And if I believe everything in the world is interconnected and we create impact with our presence, (as well as our absence), then me being absent or not showing up in my own unique way, with my unique contribution, is in some way an abandonment of my individual and social truth.
The truth that I am better for being in the world and the world is better for me being in it. And as I imagine you reading this, I KNOW the world is better with you in it and I surmise, when you feel connected and purpose full, you feel better as well.
I think there is an inherent meaning, agency and impact in just being alive. Nature is about interconnection, purposefulness, and growth. Nature is always doing what it is here to do. It doesn't question who or what it is or its mission ~ which is simply to be alive. This knowing of itself gives it energy to be itself and impact everything it touches and continuously create change. And as we are part of nature, regardless of our attempts to think otherwise ...
... we innately need to be connected to ourselves and our world ...
So although staying small, protected and isolated may feel fine and work in the short-term, in the long-term, it defeats the purpose of why we are here. Keeping ourself unknown, hidden (to ourself and others) and letting our gifts go unused doesn’t allow for the possibility of creating a positive impact, simply by being who we are.
As we move towards the refresh of spring, and watch the natural world around us simply do what it is here to do, I am hoping you and I will notice our inspirations and sparks, open our hearts to feel what draws us and find and fulfill the potential that is in each of us. To know that it is not either/or ... our journey is to find our way to belonging to ourselves and others. To know we are the bud, allow ourselves to open and blossom and know we are also part of the branch. To nurture ourselves, as we nurture others.
Just like spring flowers, it's time for us to come out, come out, wherever we are.
Belonging is being a part of something bigger than yourself and
it is also the courage to stand alone, to belong to yourself, above else.